supporting a friend through infertility

  • Last Post 19 June 2019
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Jill posted this 19 June 2019

Any tips for supporting a friend who is dealing with infertility/multiple miscarriages? We are very close and I really want to help her in any way that I can. I worry that being around me might be hard for her, because I have two kids, but I also worry that if I try to give her space it might feel like I'm abandoning her when she really needs a friend.

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Melanie posted this 20 June 2019

This is a hard one! I actually have a friend going through the same thing. It feels like theres no much you can say... but I found it best to literally just be there for her. Just be there to talk it out and lend a should to cry on if she needs it. 

Nydia posted this 21 June 2019

I have a friend who has an incompetent cervix. A little after my baby shower, she openly shared with me that she was a little jealous that I was pregnant and she wasn’t. So I made her the godmother. Maybe that wouldn’t be the proper solution for you, but I think it really helped my friend. She loves being around the baby when she has time, and she loves buying her things. She recently got pregnant so I can only hope God blesses her with a child 🙏

Diane posted this 22 June 2019

Currently in a similar situation and have been worried about the same thing. I have been there for her as someone to talk to while I listen and try to lend her some comfort. She is still going through the process of seeing doctors and trying to find out what is going on, so she doesn't know anything for sure yet. However, I have heard from others who have had a lot of trouble that they don't like to hear "there are always other options." Understandable in the sense that conceiving naturally is ideal. I guess it depends on who you're talking to and what point they are at. I'm interested in hearing opinions of others also. 

Megan posted this 19 August 2019

Just continue to tell her that you are there for her and be there to listen to her.  She doesn't want to feel abandoned and have to go through this alone so don't give her too much space.  I think it depends on the person, but don't be afraid to talk about their baby/babies, validate that they were important and that you are thinking of them.  Know that she will most likely always be thinking about it so don't be afraid to bring it up to remind her, she's already thinking about it.